English
EspañolI am living with HIV, and I want to leave an abusive relationship. What can I do?
Being HIV-positive could affect your decision to walk away from an abusive partner for reasons such as:
- fear of unwanted disclosure of your diagnosis if you try to leave;
- discrimination when you attempt to find help at shelters or other emergency housing options after leaving abuse; or
- limited financial resources if you are unable to work; therefore, it may be harder to get the money that is needed to flee or to live separately from the abuser.
If you identify as LGBTQ+, you may face additional obstacles to leaving an abusive relationship because of unfair shaming about your sexual orientation in addition to your HIV status. For more information about abuse in LGBTQ+ relationships, you can go to our LGBTQ+ Victims page.
In any case, it is important to know that there is help. You can call a local domestic violence organization where an advocate can help you figure out what you want to do next and what help is available based on your specific situation. To find an organization near you, go to our Advocates and Shelters page and select your state from the drop-down menu. You can also call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.
Another option could be to tell your doctor or nurse about the abuse and ask for referrals or support available at your local hospital, medical center, or HIV community-based organization. For example, the HIV clinic where you receive services may have a partnership with the community’s domestic violence agencies and may even have an advocate onsite at the clinic. If you are afraid that the abuser will find out that you went to a domestic violence agency, this may be a better way to seek help. However, this may only be an option if you:
- are currently receiving medical care for HIV/AIDS;
- trust your doctor/nurse; and
- can attend appointments by yourself or meet with your doctor/nurse without the abuser present.
Where can I find additional resources about HIV and intimate partner violence?
If you want to learn more about HIV/AIDS and how intimate partner violence can affect people living with HIV/AIDS, here are some additional websites that can be helpful to read through:
- Positively Safe: Addressing the Intersection of Domestic Violence & HIV/AIDS from the National Network to End Domestic Violence, including this brochure in English and Spanish;
- The Empowered video series from Greater Than AIDS;
- Violence Against Women and HIV (signs and safety planning) from The Well Project; and
- Expanding the Continuum podcast from the National Network to End Domestic Violence and Futures Without Violence.
